Live-writing: The 66th Annual Golden Globe Awards

Sorry for the delay, and I also apologize greatly if I've been boring you with all of this awards/cinema crap. I realize not all of you are interested, and that's perfectly OK. This is why I added a jump to this post, so you don't have to read all of this if it bores you. (Which it might... :/) I added some video clips as well = good entertainment for a frigid Friday.
Live-writing ended up being pretty much an epic failure. I had to eat dinner during red carpet, and there was no way I was going to keep up on typing while eating. Also, from years of mindless red carpet watching, I have developed a habit of not paying close attention to that madness. Unfortunately, I literally bore myself because I tend to either reiterate the obvious or say whatever random remark that pops into my head at any given moment, so my live-writing skills are not adept as others I have read. Boooooring. (Gah, other people make it look so easy!) My ongoing goal is to conjure up more witty and unique things to say. Nevertheless, here is my running commentary from during the show. Sorry, Zany. Some of the clips are from Hulu. :(
More musings...
Red Carpet: (as usual, channel surfing between E!, TV Guide, and the NBC pre-show)
-Ryan Seacrest: no one cares about the weather and air-conditioned limos. Is that all you got? This is going to be a long evening.
-One of the first "victims", Taraji P. Henson. She seems so down-to-earth, and I didn't know her name was Swahili! Nice! :)
-The Office crew: charismatic and cheery as always. But, what kind of frock is Jenna Fischer wearing? It looks like too much of a summer, casual dress that washes her out.
-Alec Baldwin: sometimes, he scares me, but speaking the truth never hurts. "Don-tcha just hate when E! asks you dumb questions?" LOL.
-Tina + Amy: Amy recovered really quickly from "Baby Mama" status. And, Tina is just so cleverly classy, if that makes any sense. (I know I will using those words a lot tonight.)
-Jonas Brothers, Zac Efron, etc.: Screaming tweens unite!
-Miley Cyrus: that dress is actually really nice, but she shouldn’t be wearing it. It doesn't look good on her. Also, why can't she ever shut up??? I don't care that her mother won't buy her the car she wants!
-Kate + Leo: 2 things: 1. I know black is incapable of reflecting light, but they look luminous. These "homies" need to stop making us all look like failures. (Just kidding; love them.) 2. They are forced to bear the brunt of one of Ryan Seacrest's dumbass questions: “Leo, you live out here, so you’re not used to the whole domesticated life. How did you handle that?” Umm, dude…it’s called acting.
-Brangelina: this moment of PURE INSANITY, with swarms of cameras & people all around. 'Nuff said. I guess they don't like Seacrest either.
-Anne Hathaway: Lovely blue, strapless dress. She's definitely learned her lesson from two years ago. With her harrowing turn in Rachel Getting Married, get ready for a fruitful awards season, girl!
-Slumdog Millionaire is, to the blogosphere, becoming slightly overrated at this point. Don't get me wrong; people love the movie very much (as do I), but does it deserve "Best" citations from practically everyone? That said, the cast and crew is doing a fantastic job of promoting the film and having a blast! =D Note to E!: "phone a celebrity"? Really? Clearly she hasn't the movie.
-Where's Meryl? That woman always knows what to say. As does Emma Thompson.

The Show: (Finally, shallowness over.)
-opening montage: Why on earth did they pick the song “When I Grow Up” by the Pussycat Dolls to use? Lame.
-JLo: “Mama talking.” And the 1st award of the night goes to: a very flustered Kate Winslet for The Reader. Personally, I was rooting for Viola Davis to pull an upset. She absolutely knocks it out of the park in Doubt, and Penelope Cruz, also great in Vicky Cristina Barcelona, currently leads in critics awards. I haven't seen The Reader yet, but it's on my list, of course. Loved Kate's speech even though I usually dislike when people read from prepared lists. She gave shoutouts all the right people, which is sharp. A lot of people forget to mention the author of the source material, but she didn't. Thanking her kids was so cute. Breathe, girl, breathe!
-Memo to Miley Cyrus: we don’t need to see your tongue, dear.
-Original Song: "The Wrestler" is such a beautiful song. Though, Clint Eastwood looks pissed and ready to do the Gran Torino finger-gun thing to Bruce Springsteen: "Get off my Golden Globe!!!"
-Burn After Reading clip: Hey Coen Bros.! Don Cheadle wants to work with you! [/shameless plug]
-liked the speech (or lack thereof) from the HFPA president.
-I’m not as well read on TV, but I’m surprised Jon Hamm (Mad Men) lost for Best Actor in a Drama series.
-My mother (who is complaining) needs to cut the delightful Sally Hawkins some slack. She gave (with some security from the witty Emma Thompson) a decent speech, considering that she is a Hollywood newcomer. Yes, she rambled and paused and did this and that, but she seems like a lovely person. I'm really happy she won, because her performance is quite easily one of the best comedic roles this year and deserved the high praise. I guess maybe there was the chance Meryl would win because: A. She's Meryl. B. Mamma Mia!'s box office clout. C. She gives the best speeches, making for wonderful television. D. She has 2 nominations and they might not want her to go home empty-handed. Anyway, it's so unfair that Sally had such a crappy seat, so it took her forever to get up on stage.
-Ricky Gervais venting about not being nominated. "How rude are you lot?" "Well done, Winslet! I told you, do a Holocaust movie and the awards start coming." [A reference to her self-parody on his hilarious sitcom Extras, starting at 3:25 on the video]
-On the TV miniseries front, HBO's John Adams is doing very well, with wins for the show, Laura Linney, and Paul Giamatti. Tom Hanks is usually pretty awesome, but is he high tonight? Then again, everyone at the Globes seems like that, always. I have a hunch that the spontaneous and unexpected moments are primarily the result of A LOT of champagne being served.
-Of course, a very deserved standing ovation for the late Heath Ledger. It’s going to be so sad on Oscar night. Unfortunately, all this awards buildup for him takes away from the excitement of the rest of awards season.
-Tom Brokaw???? Oh, he’s presenting the Frost/Nixon clip. My bad. He must feel so out of place.
-Foreign Film: I agree with the Waltz with Bashir director's quote on how he hopes children of the future can watch the film and think it's an "ancient video game that could never happen", but the quote is getting ancient. He's used it for every award the film has won.
-Seth Rogen’s cocaine/Mickey Rourke joke really fell through.
-Patrick Dempsey and Amy Poehler echoing: “And-and the-the Golden-Golden Globe-Globe goes-goes to-to: Alec Baldwin!" That guy is hilarious on 30 Rock, as is the entire cast. Unfortunately, he acts like a douche sometimes, detracting from the character he plays.
-Renee Zellweger’s scrunchy face perpetually disgusts me. It always looks like she ate too many lemons before coming. Also, what’s with the see-through dress? Atrocious.
-Awkward presenter pairings: P. Diddy and Kate Beckinsale, Megan Fox and Terrence Howard (btw, why does he over-enunciate his words?) Whoever picks this combinations might have had too much champagne too.
-Best Comedy series: HAHAHAHA! The most random clip for The Office: Dwight giving birth to a watermelon. (1:35 on the video)
-30 Rock wins! YAY! Tracy Morgan’s speech (2:58 on the above video), not so much. Thank God he left before he could say something super controversial. "Deal with it, Cate Blanchett!" (Whaaaat???)
-Argh, I hate when the presenter is biased, like Jane Krakowski presenting Best Actress in a Comedy Series to Tina Fey. Just kidding, I love all the 30 Rock guys! Tina’s speech = short & sweet, excellent as usual. All the haters can just suck it! But seriously, that woman truly does not deserve the hate she's received this year. It's not her fault that most people think she is actually Sarah Palin; the media firestorm behind the phenomenon is partially to blame too. I also find it amusing that she actually reads the blogosphere, but I'm glad she's well aware of the unfair criticisms.
-Steven Spielberg: a very deserved tribute to a man who has contributed so much to the magical world of cinema. You just can’t imagine movies without him. I agree with what he said: "People want to make movies that appeal to broader audiences, but we can't forget that we are an audience of individuals." However, this award always makes everyone snooze. No offense Mr. Spielberg, but I think this is the first time you've nearly made me doze off. zzzzzzzzz
-Whimsical pairing: Dustin Hoffman and Emma Thompson. Emma's joke backfired a bit, but she took it all in stride. Dustin, on the other hand: lighten up!
-Colin Farrell winning for In Bruges, another win I didn't see coming. We didn't need to know that he has a cold, though. And, Sandra Bullock's remarks made energy level shoot way down.
-Wow, that energy level is still at low levels with Sacha Baron Cohen’s monologue. The Madonna/Guy Ritchie joke was funny, though. I guess Salma Hayek didn’t agree (cutaway shot).
-Vicky Cristina Barcelona wins! I was actually predicting that. That producer’s speech was too drab though. Random thought: why did no one except Penélope show up??
-By far one of the most unexpected moments: Kate part deux. I thought there was no way she was winning twice, especially if Meryl was gonna go home empty-handed… I WAS WRONG!!! Oh my God, she won 2 awards! (My brain is desperately trying to process this as she hobbles up onstage, with the help of Leo, Emma, and a myriad of other scrambling people, and not one but two guys to escort her onstage. Amid the shock, I accidentally tune out half the speech!) She had absolutely no clue she was going to win for this, so no prepared list this time. Classy shoutouts to her fellow nominees, albeit forgetting Angelina (of all people! LOL, but I don't blame her. She is genuinely shocked.) and acknowledging the gifted author of Rev. Road, Richard Yates. After more rambling and "not wrapping up", she does wraps up...here come the waterworks. Girl, please hold it together. Btw, your husband’s right there, so don’t spill out everything. For the most part, it was a heartfelt, honestly delivered speech (yes, even at 3:59 when it gets awkward maybe). However, that was a lot to digest. One more time: oh my God, she won 2 awards! I have to get it out of my system.
-Blake Lively (Gossip Girl) and Rainn Wilson (The Office): awkward pairing handled reasonably well with an effective joke. Mad Men wins Best Drama series! I was wondering when all the love for that show was actually going to arrive.
-I knew Mickey Rourke had a shot at winning tonight. It was going to be either him or Sean, unless HFPA felt like throwing a curveball. Now, on to the Oscar! Although he seems a little confused (again, I don't blame him. He's not used to all the attention.), he gives a surprisingly contained speech, besides the obvious errors in not thanking the HFPA but thanking his dogs and Axl Rose (??). Censors probably not pleased at Darren Aronofsky, however. Btw, Leo DiCaprio is one classy dude for embracing the Mickster, but we already knew that. Where is Sean?? Mickey's "down and out" speech gives a pretty needed boost to his PR campaign this season. This is truly the comeback of the year: has-been B-list --> Oscar winner, perhaps? Despite prognosticators saying it would be too much of a risk to award Mickey, due to his iffy reputation in the industry, it's looking more and more feasible.
-Slumdog sweeps. Surprise, surprise. Jai ho!
Lastly, here are some brief post-show comments from my eccentric, "quote machine" friend Megan:

KER-SPAZ. SLUMDOG WON EVERYTHING IT WAS NOMINATED FOR. AND KATE WINSLET GOOD LORD WOMAN YOU LOVE LEO MORE THAN YOU LOVE YOUR HUSBAND BUT GOOD FOR YOU GIRL.
I love awards season. And I really love live television, where people in the audience can give presenters the bird and nobody can do anything about it. Love love love.

The spontaneity of live television never ceases to surprise us all. :)