Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts

Extended hiatus

Life has been extremely busy & somewhat frustrating. I have nothing really exciting coming up, just a lot of tests. AP, SAT II, SAT—a convergence of events, one might say. And so this extended hiatus of mine will continue indefinitely...unless my brain explodes, which it very well could. If not, I'll be back when I can say...
Courtesy of the great Kurt Vonnegut.

[src]
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It was the best of times; it was the worst of times.

Life is rather strange right now. It's March, which means two months until AP exams (aka two weeks of hell). Morale is definitely running low—everyone around me is feeling the strain of a long year that will only get worse before it gets better. The "snowmaggedon" of last month further exacerbates problems because it has made us so behind in all of our classes. What if we don't even have time to learn everything we need to know before the exams? Blerg... On the positive side, I'm going to states for forensics next weekend. I'm also going to CFLs (the national tournament for the National Catholic Forensic League) in Omaha over Memorial Day weekend, so on the forensics front, life is good. (The CFL is kind of weird. You don't have to be Catholic  and go to a Catholic school to participate. I guess it was just originally for Catholic schools but was later expanded to include other schools.) On the actual life front, life is tough.
Oscars tomorrow! Rootin' for Kathryn Bigelow (first female to win Best Director ever for her jarringly amazing film The Hurt Locker), Jason Reitman (adapted screenplay for the brilliant Up in the Air), and the one, the only MERYL STREEP (best actress...ever!). Sorry my Oscar coverage has been scant this year—no time to sleep, let alone blog about film, but I guess I can sleep when I'm dead.
Trying to stay positive. Life is a constant battle, but I can win if I keep fighting. Or perhaps all of our efforts lead to nothing. After all, Thoreau was right: "the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation." It's just like trying to find the meaning of life—you never know the answer. Life is a minefield of uncertainty. All this existentialist thinking makes me want to watch Up in the Air and read Kafka's The Metamorphosis and Thoreau's Walden again.
Hope everyone is doing well. Spring is coming soon!
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SNOWPOCALYPSE.

Due to the blizzard (and subsequently digging out from two feet of snow), we haven't had school, which means I've been at home, sipping tea, catching up on work, working ahead, and finding ways to waste an exorbitant amount of time and then feeling guilty about it. I'm slightly frustrated about not having school b/c it's screwing up my schedule and limits contact with others. Not to mention, round two is coming tonight, so I'm expecting more of the same. I wouldn't be surprised if we didn't have school for the rest of the week, but for now, and like always, I'm taking it one day at a time.
Sorry about not posting for a long time. Hope everyone's been OK. Life has been busy and exhausting. Between school and all my extracurriculars, I rarely have a minute to even breathe, let alone post. :( Olympic fever is starting to set in, but I'm going to be at a major forensics tournament and will have to miss the opening ceremonies! Boo. And of course, awards season keeps chugging along. I've tried my best to keep one eye on the developments.
Now I have to start packing for the tournament, which I'm hoping will be a blast, provided that our flight doesn't get canceled.
The snow is pretty, though.
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Fade to black—end of the decade

As the year and more importantly the decade come to a close, I wonder what will be the defining moment, phenomenon, etc. of the '00s. The obvious answer is 9/11, but it seems as if all of "the aughts" were about doom and gloom: 9/11 and its aftermath, the war in Iraq, the south Asian tsunami, Hurricane Katrina, the rising impact of industrialization on the environment, the global economic crisis, et al. Not to be Mr. Grumpy Pants, but I have to agree. There wasn't a lot to celebrate this decade. Personally, I spent a lot of time complaining about the world and losing faith in the human race after hearing about every celebrity scandal or petty concern. This decade created many pessimists, and as the world continues to spiral out of control, there's no doubt that pessimism is a growing trend.
This is certainly the decade for change. The world has evolved into a multi-polar world, flattened by the effects of globalization and technology. Industrialized countries no longer hold all influence—the rise of emerging markets has transformed the global economy, and the rest of the world is scrambling to evolve with it. Globalization has certainly brought people closer together—the world is more interconnected than ever before. But everything has its consequences. Globalization certainly does: it fuels reactionary fundamentalist groups who want to rebel against the wings of change, which have, in their opinion, distorted their traditional livelihoods.
But change was only a buzzword. Did any significant social change actually manifest itself? Sure, the US elected its first African-American president, which certainly represented a turning point in history. What about all the societal issues we constantly wish to change? Isn't it time society stepped up and actually created change? Problems cannot solve themselves, so it is my wish that the 2010s will be about carrying out the promise of positive change. If there's one thing President Obama has achieved, it's empowering our generation to get involved in the world, our world. Our generation truly has the power to achieve change, and the next decade will be our time to shine.
Just a little reflection in the waning hours of the decade. Like most people, I don't have time to properly recount this decade, i.e. make lists of the most defining events, albums, films, books, viral videos, comedic moments, etc (see the Internet), so I hope this will suffice. No matter how much of an optimist or a pessimist you are, I think you'll agree that the '00s were an interesting time to be around.
Adieu, 2000s. It's been real. 2010s, here we come!
Now, what to call this decade? Hmm...

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Pardon my dust.

My posts have been scant and brief lately, but sadly, my life doesn't allow for much time with the blogosphere anymore. The holidays are usually a time for contemplation and relaxation, but I'm finding that I actually have a ton of work to do. :( Thankfully, after the break, I will only have a year and a half of high school to go! (Yes, I am a lowly junior, in case you haven't figured that out yet.)
Christmas was uneventful. I got a new purse, which will hopefully come into good use. My old one was small and well, old. But my favorite presents actually ended up being from one of my best friends and my English teacher, both of whom have great taste in books! The latter was accidental—we played Yankee Swap on the last day before break. Everyone had to bring in a book as a present for someone in the class, and I somehow ended up with my English teacher's book. Coincidence or English nerd telepathy?
Shifting gears to something of personal excitement (!), the Oscar race has quickened its pace—the last few weeks have brought a maelstrom of precursor announcements, summarized well by the folks at InContention.com. As a perennial casual observer, I look forward to the coming weeks, when the season will really get underway (Golden Globes and various guild awards in quick succession). But there's one big caveat: my busy life can't accommodate my cinephilia. I haven't had the time to see many of the films, and like any other year, I run into the problem of simply living in suburbia, where a vast majority of the movies playing at my local multiplex are of little interest to me. But much to my surprise, my most anticipated flick, Up in the Air, is currently playing nationwide as part of Paramount's widespread campaign, and that includes my local multiplex. I'm seeing it this afternoon, so look for a new installment of Reel Brief in the coming days.
Yay! It's fun to be blogging again.
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Thank You/Merci/Danke/Gracias/谢谢



Happy Thanksgiving, blogosphere! I am eternally thankful for my friends, family, and all those around me for putting up with the pandemonium of my life. I'm so grateful for their support and encouragement through all the moments, both good and bad, that define my mercurial existence, especially during this difficult time. Every writer must certainly acknowledge the power of words. Without words, the world could not go 'round, and we wouldn't have a means of defining all the things that make up our tumultuous lives. Speaking of life, I suppose I am thankful for life as well. Excuse the cliché, but life is fleeting and precious. Even when I'm feeling downtrodden, I should continually remind myself of all the things that I have and all the people that make my life enjoyable and happy to be alive. Or as our principal likes to say: "Hallelujah! It's great to be alive!!" That's the attitude I need. And, of course, thanks to you, readers, for sharing your inspiring words and pictures and for reading these scattered thoughts.
Gobble gobble! ;)
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Lost in Translation



This movie has always been very near and dear to my heart. I think of it often, especially when traveling to a new place or when I feel lonely. It poignantly captures the increasing isolation of our flattening world and how vital human contact really is. Personally, it makes me wish I was more connected to my surroundings. And I love how the sprawl of Tokyo is, in essence, an integral character in the film. That aspect makes me I wish I could travel more often and become a more worldly person. Maybe that's why I'm always so fascinated by people who have actually been places, experienced life, and have something to say about it, like my English teacher, whose first teaching job was teaching English in Japan. And of course, Japan always reminds me of Lost in Translation. Everything comes full circle these days... It's like all tangents somehow lead to the same endpoint.
I feel a certain, ineffable emptiness in my life. Part of it is that I miss having time to watch movies. I want to rewatch Lost in Translation sometime soon. I haven't seen it in basically forever, and I reaaaallly adore it. 


 
*sigh* My brain is so void of ideas these days, a combination of school fatigue and dissatisfaction with my life right now.
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Something wicked this way comes...







The Weird Sisters = Macbeth, Harry Potter, and Halloween all rolled into one.
Happy Halloween! 
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I'm not dead...yet.

For those of you who may have thought that I dropped off the face of the Earth, you were fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on what kind of person you are) incorrect. I've been extremely busy lately, and school has stressed me out beyond the point of sanity. No all-nighters yet, but I've had some pretty frequent late nights.
Since I like lists, here's one about my school year thus far:

1. AP English - easily my favorite class. The spontaneity really fits my learning style. I actually somewhat enjoy the in-class essays. (Strange but true.) We've got a melting pot of personalities in the class, creating an interesting vibe during discussions. Some people are very raucous and argumentative and blurt out anything that comes to mind even if it's a nonsensical mess; some people don't say a word; and some people try to contribute intelligently when possible and restrain themselves when they don't have something valuable to say (I'd like to think I belong in this category.)
2. The best part of English: my teacher is pretty much one of my favorite people ever, which is why he deserves his own position on this list. He's quite a character: He wears the same outfit everyday (a blazer, dress shirt, and khakis—English teacher style), drinks incessant amounts of coffee (which makes the room perpetually smell like coffee), and is a scatterbrained, tangential English nerd just like yours truly. Needless to say, we get along pretty well. :)
3. Taking a boatload of AP classes- I've realized that I'm probably taking too many AP classes. The material is not necessary difficult. It's just that the workload piles up—the more you take, the more work you get. More work = no free time = stressed me. I am rarely in a calm state of mind anymore.
4. Drama- there's far too much drama in school. Let's face it: people get too riled up about the most trivial concerns, and they just need to chill. Really. The world is too complicated to worry about all the little things in life.
5. Time management- see number 3. I've gotten really bad at this. I always find a way to procrastinate, either by doing work that doesn't need to be done, browsing the Internet, or just stalling. Blah. I hope this doesn't become an unbreakable habit.
I miss having a free weekend. Most of my weekends are working weekends, aka trying to cram in all the work I possibly can. I miss serenity.

[src]
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Restless

I don't know if it's b/c of being busy or just plain writer's block, but my poetry this summer was not very prolific. Here's one I wrote a couple of weeks ago, somewhat reflecting how I've felt lately. I always feel restless by August, but this year I feel particularly anxious to get back to my hectic education. I don't know why.
By the time you read this, I will probably feasting on some delicious and authentic dim sum in 'Frisco's Chinatown! :)

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"The concept is absurd. The idea that we can only be complete with another person is evil! Right?"

This post is brought to you by the latest trend on Facebook: MarriageBot, which basically predicts your possible future spouses and ranks them. Wow. And, it's not even one of those insanely dumb quizzes. It just randomly gives you a list of people based on things you've done on Facebook. I do not wish to try it b/c it seems like just another one of those ridiculous, trivial applications that define the almighty Facebook.
It's strange that a dumb Facebook application somehow relates to two films I watched recently. I finally got around to seeing Before Sunrise and its sequel Before Sunset (the origin of this post's ridiculously long title). I won't mention too much about the plot; it's not what this post is about. The first film deals with two strangers in Vienna, an American guy, Jesse (Ethan Hawke), and a French girl, Céline (Julie Delpy). They spend one enchanted night wandering around the city, talking about not only themselves, but their philosophical beliefs and opinions on a variety of topics. Both are rather cynical about the idea of romance, true love and its possibilities. But, they realize they share a connection but have such a limited amount of time together since Jesse has a plane to catch in the morning. The sequel picks up the story nine years later, where the two meet by chance in Paris. Things have inevitably changed over the years. An unhappily married Jesse has written a novel based on that night in Vienna, and Paris is the last stop on his book tour. Céline lives in Paris and works as an environmental activist while going in and out of unsuccessful relationships. However, the cynical mindsets still remain, and they are eager to reconnect.
One of the overall themes in both films is the idea that perhaps brief encounters are better than prolonged relationships. Maybe people inevitably grow dissatisfied and sick of each other; the only reason people stay together is b/c they are expected to do so. And yet, a lot of people these days focus their lives on finding their one true love, using all kinds of tactics like eHarmony and all those online dating services. (Let's hope people don't have to start taking MarriageBot seriously!) Some idiots even secretly fly to Argentina and make up a story about hiking on the Appalachian Trail. What they don't realize is that the idea of that one person you're destined to be with could be just a load of b.s. Society tends to idealize this concept.
I know I, too, am a cynic when it comes to romance, but I'm not saying that long term commitment is impossible. I'm just trying to point out that people take great strides just to find someone that will probably disappoint them eventually. They can't always be happy together.
To take a more optimistic side, I guess people shouldn't try so hard to find love and let it come to them instead. It might take them by surprise: They might find a connection simply by chance. One thing is for sure: There are few people in the world that you'll find a true connection with, so don't let them pass you by like in the case of Jesse and Céline.
In the meantime, I highly recommend Before Sunrise and Before Sunset. Although both are largely conversational, particularly the latter, they will definitely give you something to ponder afterward and will linger in your mind for a while. These are two refreshing flicks that abandon the usual gimmicks romance films constantly employ. Instead of idealizing romance, Before Sunrise and Before Sunset provide characters that are real people with real problems. The luminous Delpy and charming Hawke share undeniable chemistry, and the witty dialogue and truthful themes make everything both lively and meaningful. In general, I think they are two lovely little flicks. On the other hand, my pondering seems more appropriate for a conversation over coffee in a café on a cold day rather than on a humid August afternoon. Oh well.
Before Sunset
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Back to Reality

This post sounds incredibly sappy, especially since I wrote a 3-page entry in my notebook about this very topic, but you'll catch my drift.

It's a weird feeling being back from speech camp. I've been home for a few days, but I can't seem to settle back into my normal life. I'm constantly on Facebook talking with my camp friends or just sitting around instead of doing actual work that I'm supposed to be doing. Camp was a hectic but structured schedule where I set benchmarks for myself and interacted with so many amazing people who eventually became my "family". The daily routine quickly became embedded in my mind, so being at home feels so different. I'm slowly transitioning back to normalcy.
Reflecting on camp, I realize how meaningful the experience was. I remember thinking I would regret my decision to go b/c I had to give up going to the Columbia summer program and the hours I spent filling out the lengthy application. I never should have questioned myself. Camp was one of the best experiences of my life. I learned more about forensics than I ever could have imagined, thanks to an incredibly dedicated and encouraging team of coaches and instructors. Because of their tireless work, I learned to soak in every practice speech, lecture, lab, etc. and give 100% of myself in everything. I knew I had to take full advantage of every opportunity. They gave me the knowledge and confidence I need to compete on the national circuit. I'm so excited for the year to begin so that I can apply everything I have learned and teach it to others. Overall, our coaches and instructors truly inspired and empowered me, and I am beyond grateful.
But perhaps the most important reason the stress and sleep deprivation I suffered was worth it: I gained a family, a network of people whom I know I can count on. The staff and of course, my fellow campers, truly became my family. At first, I, like always, was afraid I wouldn't fit in and feel like an outcast. But, I soon discovered I had incorrectly judged them. Not only do they share the same interest of forensics, but they are so supportive and enthusiastic about it. At the end of the day, that was the only thing that mattered. When we have such a strong common bond, I guess everything else is only relative. With them, I found a temporary sense of belonging, a place within a microcosm. I was content with myself instead of trying fit the mold b/c I was the mold.
The bonds of family are not easily broken. I will hold on to the connections and try to keep in touch with everyone. They enriched my camp experience and created fond memories that will last a long time. Moreover, they're great people to be around, and I almost always felt welcome around them. For all of these reasons, it was almost impossible to say goodbye. Even though I miss everyone greatly, I will see many of them at major national tournaments throughout the year. So, I suppose my family is never far away. I'm looking forward to seeing them again very soon!
But for now, back to reality. School will commence in just under a month, and I need to brace myself for the busy year ahead. I have some ideas for future posts, and I will try to return to posting less personal thoughts soon. Hope everyone is doing okay. :)
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Singin' in the Rain

This afternoon, we journeyed into D.C. via the metro to visit the Newseum. This museum is devoted to journalism and how it has affected the stories of our times. It is extremely worthwhile for news junkies, aficionados of current events, or escaping rainy days; I highly recommend spending at least a day there the next time you visit D.C. I emphasize at least a day b/c during the three hours we were there, I only managed to work through two floors of exhibits.
However, that's not what this post is about. Rather, this is about the latter assertion, escaping rainy days, but not even remotely in the traditional sense.
As soon as we got off the metro, we noticed a bit of drizzle. Not thinking much of it, we began the surprisingly long walk to the museum. Much to our shock, we heard a clap of thunder, and then, the sky released a hurricane of raindrops. And, it began to pour. The raindrops got bigger and bigger until they transformed into some of the biggest raindrops I have ever witnessed.
Unfortunately, we have all been very engrossed in our work for the last two weeks, so most of us did not think to bring an umbrella, raincoat, poncho, or whatever method crazy teenagers--in our case, forensicators--use to combat precipitation. And besides, it hadn't rained much until today. A few lucky souls (fortune tellers, b/c they seemed like they somehow prophesied this would happen) did bring an umbrella or two, but they too were not spared from the torrential downpour.
Our trek was most likely quite a sight for passers-by. I mean, really, it's 42 teenagers and 9 coaches running through the streets of D.C. in pouring rain singing random warmup songs we learned here at camp (the singalong partially initiated by my highly energetic friend Kyle). I had to continually stop to wipe water from my eyes before proceeding. We crossed streets, jumped over puddles, and dragged our weary feet through rough sidewalks and on sandy, gravel paths along the National Mall (I don't recall D.C. infrastructure being so poor). Throughout, we cursed and complained, whined and wailed, but when we finally reached our destination, everyone was having a good laugh about what we had just experienced.
However, our tribulations were not over yet. As we stood around the outside of the building to regroup and catch our breaths no less, we noticed a strange contraption above us. It seemed to be catching rainwater from the roof, and as the rain escalated, the contraption released a tidal wave of water, drenching the people who stood beneath it.
We thought we had endured enough, but we were wrong again. Entering the Newseum was like walking into a room full of ice. The air conditioning was on full blast, making the interior colder than the exterior. My friends and I quickly retreated the bathroom, then to the gift shop, where I reluctantly shelled out $20 for a souvenir T-shirt to replace my drenched one. Fortunately, it's a shirt that I will wear again b/c interestingly enough, it says "News Junkie" on the front. Nice. :) Then, we headed to the café to warm ourselves up with coffee.
That was the end of our fearful journey but only the beginning of my unbelievably amusing day. The rest is kind of unrelated to this post and I need sleep, so we can concern ourselves with those divulgences later.
OK, fine. One detail. I got my first ever paper copy of The Onion today! Yay! I found some at the subway station. How exciting.
I end with the tagline of one of my most favorite films, wholly epitomized in today's events.
"When it rains, it pours." -Magnolia (1999)
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Speaking Up a Storm

Sorry for the lack of updates. Camp has been full of jam-packed, long days. I'm usually up by 7 and don't get to bed until midnight. Needless to say, the schedule has been stressful with the added consequence of me being directionally challenged. I still get lost around campus, and our rooms for lecture, lab, practice speeches, etc. change everyday. Why couldn't they reserve the same rooms for two weeks? That would make it much less tasking.
However, I'm learning A LOT and can definitely take back everything I learned to the rest of my team this fall. I'm looking forward to utilizing my new knowledge and passing it along to underclassmen. Even though it's stress-inducing, I am trying to maintain a positive attitude.
Mostly everyone here is so nice and supportive, both my peers and the faculty. I've made many new friends, and although I don't always feel like I fit in (the perpetual conflict), they've made everything a fun time.
Tonight, we actually had some free time b/c there was a faculty dinner. Everyone was extremely eager to get off campus for a few hours. About half the camp decided to go to the movies. So, in a largely unorganized arrangement involving a confusion of cabs, we went to see the newest Harry Potter at the nearest movie theatre. I'll post my thoughts when I have more time, but let's just say it was very different from the book (albeit I haven't read it for about three years), anti-climactic at times, and surprisingly inappropriate. Well, maybe it's just due to the fact that we teenagers tend to misconstrue everything. We were laughing hysterically at those moments. Very awkward. Long story, but if you see the movie, you might notice it too. Essentially, after years of Pottermania, I've learned not to expect much from the movies. The books are so ridiculously well-written and the film industry so commercialized that film versions will hardly ever transcend literature.
Tomorrow, I get to sleep in for the first time since I got here, so that's a relief. I'm also going to get my laundry done since it's the only time I'll have.
One week down, one to go! :)
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Small Town Wonder

I got back late Monday night from visiting New York's Finger Lake region and Cornell University. Besides the usual Ivy League admissions jargon and how you shouldn't write your essay on the grief of losing a pet or other such cliché topics, I learned a very important lesson: Small town America is hopelessly deprived.
During my travels, I often look forward to stopping at a rest area and purchasing a warm Tall Starbucks Chai Tea Latte. It has nearly become a tradition that I equip myself with a Starbucks beverage on long journeys. But this time, Starbucks was nowhere to be found. The route to Ithaca passes through vast stretches of farmland bordering settlements that are probably too small to call towns. I suppose these places aren't as remote as say, Kansas, but they're basically in the middle of nowhere.
My father was similarly in desperate need of caffeine after getting up at the crack of dawn to drive. Much to our dismay, we passed by exit after exit of emptiness and found neither rest stops nor commercial areas. Just cows. And cornfields. And more cornfields. No Starbucks in sight. Even the McDonald's golden arches were few and far between.
Eventually, I found solace in a makeshift latte I concocted at the convenience store adjacent to a gas station where we made a pit stop. I spotted a bag of spiced chai among the limited selection of teabags and added to it some hot water, half and half, and Splenda. Bingo. Not as good as Starbucks, but hey, sometimes we have to compromise.
Ultimately, I suppose the greater lesson here is not to take your lattes for granted. The next time you pick up your morning cup o' joe at your local Starbucks, be it on busy Park Ave. in Manhattan or where I live in sleepy suburbia, remember that Farmer Joe in the heartland is working in the fields without the rejuvinating power of Starbucks.
Btw, a little plug for a blog I recently discovered. You might enjoy reading about one of my college friends as she spends the summer interning in the mind-boggling megalopolis otherwise known as China.
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Still Here

Finals are over. Earlier, I actually had time (wow, what a concept) to bake cookies for my newspaper staff to thank them for a (mostly) productive year. Yummy. =>
With only two days left, school is over for the most part. Unfortunately, I have to carefully plan my summer, seeing as that I have lots of things to accomplish. I have a few colleges to visit, forensics camp at George Mason University for two weeks in July, summer assignments, volunteering, and more. On a brighter note, my family and I are visiting San Francisco in August. I've never been to California, so I'm really looking forward to it. And, I can't wait to get out of suburbia for a while.
For now, I'm enjoying the moment. It's nice to be in a good mood for once. My English teacher told me that she could see me as a writer when I'm older (very flattering coming from her). Our wind ensemble is the official music provider at graduation this weekend, and I'm seeing Up tomorrow with some friends as a last get-together before the summer. Life is good. :)
After this, I'll be back to posting more substantive remarks. Up review next.
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Clutter

...on my desk and in my brain.
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Into the Storm

Finals week is nearly here, so my posts will be sparse for the next week or two. In the meantime, enjoy your weekend! I unfortunately do not have much to look forward to this weekend, just studying and auditioning for an orchestra. I really hope I don't blank out in the audition room...
Forensics banquet tonight!
Sorry this post is so pointless.
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This was uncalled for.

If you haven't figured out yet, I'm not a typical teenager. I don't usually mind this and have learned to accept it, but sometimes it just bothers me that I can't get along with other people. Every now and then, I try to join a conversation with acquaintances that I don't know very well but hope to get to know better, and it always backfires, like the other day, when I started talking to a few idiots after overhearing their conversation. They stared at me blankly and subsequently walked away. Geez.
I don't let incidents like these get under my skin, but I always wonder why I can't trust people. Someone can seem like a perfectly kind individual, but who knows if they actually are? We're always hiding something, each and every one of us.
In a unexpected segue, I am currently reading A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers, easily one of the most innovative books I've ever read. It's hard to describe its style. I mean, it's a memoir, but not in the typical sense. Eggers, who is now a bestselling writer and editor of McSweeney's, candidly recounts the loss of both of his parents to cancer when he was 21 and the responsibility of raising his 8 year old brother afterwards. Yes, it's sad and thought-provoking, but it's surprisingly hilarious. His sardonic and witty satire makes the book very entertaining. Like I mentioned before, it's hard to explain, so read the book to find out what I mean!
The way the book relates to my anecdote is that it comes back to the thing about hiding pieces of yourself. On the outside, it's like we have a protective shell that holds everything in place, while on the inside, we might be on the verge of collapse. But, our "shell" is concealing the breakdown we might be having. Likewise, when someone looks at Dave Eggers, they probably don't see the pain and suffering he carries around. In the book, he briefly alludes to this observation, saying that there were times when he wanted to flaunt his heartbreak in front of people because that's how he wanted to be defined: The Tragic Person. Other times, he wished he could put his personal loss behind him because he didn't want to solely be associated with that. For instance, his family had become somewhat of a legend in the suburban Chicago town where he grew up, and it upset him that people didn't really remember them for anything else.
You can never tell exactly who people are. When people look at me, they might not see an ambitious, pessimistic, stubborn girl who simply wants to fit into society and make sense of the world. They might just see a nerd who tries too hard to be nice.
(An aside: the post title is from the introduction to the book. I find it very fitting since I did not intend to make these connections in this post.)
Blerg, I have nothing else to say. Life is booooooring, but songs like this one always make me feel a little better.

I love John Mayer. :)
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Jumping on the bandwagon...

...because it's Friday and I don't want to do my homework. :)
8 things I did yesterday:
1. Went to the dentist for a checkup
2. Watched The Office and 30 Rock (an aside: I think the video I posted the other day is a lot funnier if you actually watch the show and know what's going on. Otherwise, it's kind of odd. But isn't everything on that show odd??! That's why we love it!)
3. Studied the names of body parts in French (And to go along with that, we did the "hokey-pokey", "Simon Says", "Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes", and other kiddie songs en français, which became slightly embarrassing.)
4. Sit-ups and push-ups in an effort to exercise more
5. Mass-studied for Chem test
6. Practiced clarinet concerto
7. Read The Namesake
8. Slept. (OK, maybe that doesn't count.)
8 things I'm looking forward to:
1. Forensics banquet at the end of month (senior speeches are always a lot of fun!)
2. Summer @ Columbia - I was accepted, but my parents decided it would be better for me to go to Forensics camp at George Mason this summer. Not a bad choice, and it is still a fine opportunity, but I'm still bummed that I will not be exploring the Big Apple this summer. Also, I committed a lot of time in preparing the application and got accepted, only to give it up. The good news is I can reapply next year.
3. Writing a short story from an idea that has been floating around in my head
4. Family trip to San Francisco this summer (possibly)
5. Volunteering at various places this summer
6. Screenwriting class this summer at my local theatre (trying to develop my interests)
7. Performing my clarinet concerto with my orchestra (albeit majorly nerve-racking)
8. Did I mention summer?
8 things I wish I could do:
1. Compose a song (Even with all of my musical instruction and experience, I don't actually have a lot of creative talent.)
2. Run fast
3. Manage my weight easily
4. Multi-task efficiently
5. Volunteer in an impoverished country to witness real suffering/poverty
6. Have a career that I will completely enjoy (Is it possible?)
7. Be self-confident and get rid of my pessimism (I'm trying.)
8. Fit into society (I'm convinced I will always be an outcast, but who knows? Besides, lots of people achieve greatness from being peculiar. Maybe I just need to embrace my individual differences.)
8 books I want to read:
Dreams from My Father, Barack Obama
Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell
Unaccustomed Earth, Jhumpa Lahiri (Well, anything by Jhumpa Lahiri. I love her writing style.)
East of Eden, John Steinbeck
Julie & Julia: 365 Days, 524 Recipes, 1 Tiny Apartment Kitchen, Julie Powell
What Is the What: The Autobiography of Valentino Achak Deng, Dave Eggers
Infinite Jest, David Foster Wallace
In Cold Blood, Truman Capote

Blerg, this post is so boring. Need to write something interesting for a change.
P.S.: I apologize if I haven't been around to any of your blogs lately. I will catch up soon!
More musings...